How To Cheat In A UWI Exam

Examinations are in full swing and students are either preparing to pass their exams fairly, preparing to cheat, preparing to fail or failing to prepare. I have never had the desire or need to cheat in an exam. If I’m not prepared, then I accept the possibility of failing. Unfortunately not all share this view as attempts to cheat in exams at UWI is ridiculously frequent. During my undergraduate years I never thought it was possible to effectively cheat. Exams are carefully monitored as invigilators search students upon entry to prevent the smuggling of electronics, paperwork etc and vigilantly walk around during the examination. Students are also not allowed to write on ny part of their bodies before or after starting the examination and are not allowed to leave the room unchaperoned once the examination has started. This sounds like a pretty solid cheater proof way of conducting exams. But students still attempt to cheat, most, unsuccessfully. It was not until I started invigilating exams that I realize how clever some students are with regards to cheating.

How Medical Sciences Students Cheat

It is well-known that the medical sciences (MBBS) program repeats the multiple choice papers yearly so incoming medical sciences students can benefit from having all the answers ahead of time. Some students memorize the questions and answers and record them then pass them down to the newer students the following year. In an attempt to minimize new students having the questions ahead of time, no student is allowed to leave the exam room with the question paper. I don’t believe that passing on the questions to newer students is cheating! It is the duty of the lecturers to make changes to the examinations yearly. That would solve a simple issue.

So how do they cheat in examinations? Well one of the duties of an invigilator is to chaperone students who need to use the bathroom. It has been noted however that med students use the bathroom significantly more than any other group of students on campus. At times one student will use the bathroom as much as 6 times during a 2 hour examination. Ridiculous! It has been determined that this is done to have the invigilators distracted to allow classmates to collude and quickly share answers. Very clever.

Last week I caught red-handed a student who has mastered the art of cheating in examinations at UWI. A student sitting the course “PHTH****” used the strategy that would easily fool any inexperienced invigilator. At the start of the examination she saw me approaching her desk and asked me if I could throw away her apple remnants. Not pleased with her request I requested that she wait until I could get some paper towels as her saliva and my hand would certainly not make direct contact. While she waited I signed the receipts I had but she couldn’t wait so she asked another invigilator. By the time I was done signing I noticed her unnecessarily ‘doing her hair’ while she peeked over at her colleagues multiple choice paper. I figured it was a ‘one-time-peek’ so I ignored it. I noticed she kept asking invigilators to do things for her whenever they were nearby and as soon as they left she would take another peek. I went to her area to monitor the situation and that was when another invigilator told me he saw her looking at her classmates paper while she ‘fixed’ he hair. She saw me close by and still made attempts to copy. For the duration of the exam her question paper was fixed on one page, yet she was answering all the questions. Strange! She saw that I was a potential threat and wanted me out of her space. She called me and reminded me that she had asked me to throw away her apple remnants! Mind you, another invigilator had already taken care of this! It was at this point I decided to make permanent residence in her presence and stood between her and her classmate, blocking the path to her future, covering the light at the end of the tunnel, crushing her hopes and dreams. This didn’t make her happy so immediately she had a flu, forcing a sneeze and trying to unblock a stuffy nose. She asked me to get her some paper towel. I stood firm as I told her to wait. I had another invigilator take my place after a quick nonverbal update and I went for the paper towel. I then had her moved to another seat and suddenly she could answer no question on the paper, she was the first person to leave the exam room.

Upon further inquiries I found out this wasn’t her first attempt to cheat. In another exam two weeks ago she brought a sanitary napkin in a clear plastic bag along with her stationery. During the examination she asked a male invigilator to take her to the bathroom. She took out the sanitary napkin in the exam room and took it to the bathroom where she ‘made the change’. The time taken to make the change, the sound of paper in the bathroom and her refusal to wash her hands (even after it was noted) led us to become suspicious of her actions. Who changes a sanitary napkin in the middle of a 2 hour exam? Not before, not after, during!

These events have led to planned changes which will prevent this, but her effort to cheat was the most significant I have seen in a UWI exam. It takes too much work to cheat though, it make more sense to invest efforts in preparation.

 

Aldeam Facey 2017

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To Beat Or Not To Beat

It was a cold dark night, full of mischief that evades memory. I stepped through the gate like I was the ‘man a yaad’, only to be greeted by the lady of the house. She was clearly angry about what I had done. Back in those days we kids didn’t have smart phones, so I doubt it had anything to do with nude videos on Instagram or voice notes telling her how good it taste. But whatever transpired that night was whipped from memory as the lady of the house made her inquiries. We were still at the gate, lack of preparation this time around prevented her from having the special leather belt with the names ‘Aldeam’ and ‘Everlee Facey’ etched on its buckle. As she held my shirt, I could see her silhouette looking left and right for an instrument of correction. Knowing this I made attempt to escape the prison of her arms. But like the love of God ‘neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature…’ was able to separate us. As I struggled to be free I recognized the strength of a woman. She finally found a substantial element capable of forgiving sins, purifying and creating a new creature. A loose chain hanging from the gate became less an item of security, less an element of aesthetics but became a whip, a lie detector test and a rod of correction. As the chains of Olympus fell squarely on my back, ‘wooii’ was my cry. All secrets were revealed, all apologies made and the lord was remembered.

‘Weh yuh did deh?’

Chains…

‘Look from when mi a call yuh?’

Chains…

‘Dweet again!’

Chains…

With each question tied to a swing to encourage a speedy response, confirmation was guaranteed. The session was probably two minutes long, but it felt like an hour. All I know for sure, is that whatever I did, was never repeated.

www.lifeofajamaican.com

Memories of my most noteworthy spankings floated around my mind as the video of a young girl being spanked by her mother was echoed by the Jamaican media. Naturally people took sides; some believed the mother (who has since been arrested) was too extreme and was guilty of child abuse, others thought nothing was wrong. It may seem contrary to the truth, but based on my experience, such expressions of anger by a mother, when her child misbehaves,comes from a heart of pure love. She wants what is best for her child, she doesn’t want her daughter to make the same mistakes she did. At least that is what I believe. Our culture is supported by a large number of people who believe they should never ‘spare the rod and spoil the child”. Majority of the Population are Christians and as a child I often hear the following text used to justify spankings:

“Proverbs 13: 24 He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.” (KJV).

There are many other methods of punishing children for their misconduct such as removing privileges. In the context of rural Jamaica, where such privileges were initially nonexistent  that may not be the best option. I don’t believe there is anything wrong with spanking, majority of the concerns regarding the recent video was the mothers use of the machete. Now clearly, this mother knew what she was doing, clearly she is an experienced machete wielder. No dogs or children were chopped and as in my case, that was probably the closest ‘rod of correction’ she could find. In any case, I disagree with the use of a machete as it is a ‘high risk’ choice but I completely support spanking!

 

-Aldeam Facey 2017

The Blue Mountains Jamaica: A Quick ‘Peak’

Blue Mountain Peak is the highest place in Jamaica with a height of 2256 meters. The journey to the peak starts at Mavis Bank. You will then cross the river and initiate the thigh burning climb. It is strongly recommended that you start the hike in the night as the sun, plus a climb can be a deadly combination. Usually groups will stop overnight at the cabins at Portland gap. The journey from Mavis Bank to the cabins will take between 4 and 7 hours depending on your level of fitness. I have however seen a case where it took a young lady over 13 hours without luggage! The journey from the cabins to the peak takes 1.5 to 2 hours – again depending on your level of fitness – so in order to view the breath taking sunrise, you will have to leave the cabins about 3:30am. To better describe the experience, view the photos below:

The Journey starts in the night. subsequent photos will be in the day for you to better view the landscapes.
The Journey starts in the night. Subsequent photos will be in the day for you to better view the landscapes.

Blue Mountain at the start

Blue Mountain Crossing the river

Blue Mountain (www.lifeofajamaican.wordpress.com)

A dangerous area to walk at nights. A path just about half of a meter or less in width, very long fall!
A dangerous area to walk at nights. A path just about half of a meter or less in width, very long fall!

Blue Mountain (www.lifeofajamaican.wordpress.com)

Blue Mountain (www.lifeofajamaican.wordpress.com)

Blue Mountain (www.lifeofajamaican.wordpress.com)

Beautiful!
Beautiful!

Blue Mountain (www.lifeofajamaican.wordpress.com)

Blue Mountain (www.lifeofajamaican.wordpress.com)

DON'T GET LOST: STAY ON TRACK: NO SHORTCUTS
DON’T GET LOST: STAY ON TRACK: NO SHORTCUTS
Many scenes to capture
Many scenes to capture

Blue Mountain (www.lifeofajamaican.wordpress.com)

Blue Mountain (www.lifeofajamaican.wordpress.com)

Fog
Fog

At the Cabin

Blue Mountain (www.lifeofajamaican.wordpress.com)

Blue Mountain (www.lifeofajamaican.wordpress.com)

"A nuh nuttn fi mi walk inna Rome an start a fyah"
“A nuh nuttn fi mi walk inna Rome an start a fyah”

At the Peak

Blue Mountain (www.lifeofajamaican.wordpress.com)

Blue Mountain (www.lifeofajamaican.wordpress.com)

Blue Mountain (www.lifeofajamaican.wordpress.com)

Blue Mountain (www.lifeofajamaican.wordpress.com)

Blue Mountain (www.lifeofajamaican.wordpress.com)

Blue Mountain (www.lifeofajamaican.wordpress.com)

Just before the sunrise
Just before the sunrise
A photo, especially from a point and shoot camera, cannot in anyway grasp the true beauty of the Blue Mountain Peak sunrise! Breath taking - No really, I was out of breath by the time I got here.
A photo, especially from a point and shoot camera, cannot in anyway grasp the true beauty of the Blue Mountain Peak sunrise! Breath taking – No really, I was out of breath by the time I got here.

– Aldeam Facey 2015

Conflict Of Interest #2: A Stranger Sends You Credit Accidentally.

Today I received $200 credit from a number I couldn’t recognize. With a pleased countenance I tried to figure out who it was that made my day. I didn’t want to call and say ‘Who is this?’ as that may be offensive if it really was a friend.
image

The person called, I answered, but before I could say thank you, the caller said ‘Never mind, wrong number.’ and hung up. Later I tried calling, no answer.  She returned the call tonight and I told her she sent a message to me erroneously. She Said ‘okay’, then hung up. I think that justifies me keeping the credit, don’t you think? Well I wanted to return it, but based on her response, I don’t think she cares. I still feel a little awkward so if I’m going to keep it, you are all going down with me. I will send $25 to the first three (3) persons who  comment.

 

– Aldeam Facey 2015

Conflict of Interest #1: Sitting Beside A Smelly Person In Church

Psalms  1:1  Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful.

The Church is a public place, doors open to all, but as with all public places one must be considerate of others especially where personal hygiene is considered.

smelly

So I was in church yesterday, yes, on the Sabbath day, the day set aside for rest and worship. Shortly after my arrival a gentlemen came in, apparently I was sitting in his seat. I moved aside and allowed him to reclaim his throne. He seemed to be a great guy, very interested in the word. Unfortunately he did not appear to be of perfectly sound mind – but hey, who is? My problem was that his smell was very… very strong and I was not pleased with it. I am not one to scorn a fellow and the whole aim of a Christian is to be more like Christ daily. Jesus interacted with everyone, not once is there a record of Him discriminating. But it was hard for me to sing a note or to recite a scripture. I felt as though I was suffocating. For the duration of the service I breathed out much more than I breathed in, or so it would appear. The smell stained the back of my throat, I could not even swallow my own saliva. I watched as he aggressively took care of the itch on his testicles, flinched as he raised his arm, moved to the right as he moved to the right, to the left as he moved to the left.  I didn’t want to say anything as he may be offended and I did not at the moment have the resources to provide any assistance. Quite possibly he could not have done anything about it, it’s just his situation and without help it may just be unavoidable.

I sat beside him, suffering in silence until the end of the service. What would you do?

– Aldeam Facey 2015

Jamaican Nicknames

My grandmother is so nice they call her Miss Nicey, her sister is so cool,  they call her Miss Cooly, their brother is so hard they call him Maas Rocky. Given that I am so awesome, will they eventually call me…. Awe-sy!?

Nickname

In the lower and middle class Jamaican society, where bureaucracy and hierarchy fail to prevail, where regular informal conversations form the basis of relationships, Christian names are seldom used. In lieu of the Christian name, a name descriptive of a physical characteristic, occupation or some other defining personal trait is used. This is done because these names are much easier to remember and often times they are very funny.
Let us look at some examples
Sellers on the street are called by the names of the items they sell followed by the word ‘man’ . In some cases they are called by the adverb of the item they sell. A man selling juice will be called either ‘Juice-man’ or ‘Juicy’ (if the seller is female only ‘Juicy’ is used). There are no written rules for this form of nomenclature but a Jamaican always know the correct terms to use. If a gentleman sells mangoes in the market, he is called ‘Mango-man’ not ‘Mango-y’ because that just doesn’t sound right.
A guy passes my home every Sunday selling Gleaner magazines. I purchase from him, usually weekly, but sadly never asked his name, but when ever I see him and give him a hail ‘Gleaner-man’ works just fine. He is not offended because it defines his occupation.

Personal Nicknames
There are Nicknames not associated with one’s occupation and are purely bases on one’s character. These names follow the same aforementioned ‘rules’. If you are a tall male be prepared to be called ‘Tall-man’. If you are short it will likely be ‘Short-man’ or ‘Shorty’

There was a case where a young man was sexually abused by another person. To date he is called ‘Victim’.
The horizontal distance between the corners of a certain young man’s lips is far greater than that of the normal population, he is called ‘Fish-mouth’ When I was young a few relatives called me ‘Peas head’ or ‘Peasy’ but due to its literal inaccuracy, it did not catch on.
These Nicknames are meant to be either embarrassing or catchy and can often result in fights.

What are some of the funny or embarrassing nicknames you have been called or have heard? Comment below.

– Aldeam Facey 2015

“A Proper Backsiding” – Child Abuse Or a Cure For Disobedience?

A “backsiding” is a term often used, especially in rural Jamaica, to describe a spanking. This spanking is usually very thorough and is of an intensity proportional to the offense.
We Jamaicans are very angry people and a simple backsiding, where it involves the aluminum pot covers, barbed wires, chains, frying pans or ‘anyting di han can find’, may easily be classified as attempted murder.

“Aldeeeeam!”
“… Yes”
“Gwaan fi di belt an come”
“…. ”
” Mi seh gwaan fi di belt!”

A ‘sticky’ situation, a dilemma characterized by its complexity. Do I obey and accept my guaranteed, immediate reward or do I disobey and have my reward multiplied later? A tough decision I had to make as a child, a decision which became skewed in favor of immediate acceptance as time progressed.
I had a very interesting childhood, whenever I was sick with ‘disrespect’, Dr. Mommy would prescribe and administer ‘a propa backsiding’ or a ‘good buss ass’. It may sound violent, but I don’t believe I turned out too bad. Would the other techniques work? What if during my disrespect full phase my mother prescribed a time out? “Go to your room Aldeam” or “No TV” just to give me some time to think about what I’ve done. I laugh at the very thought. I personally don’t think that would work for a tough head like me, a very stubborn boy.
All the adults in my immediate and extended family turned out to be well disciplined persons, and all had been served a good dish of butt whooping.
Traditionally speaking a spanking was believed to cure the following childhood diseases:

  • Back talking
  • Teeth hissing
  • Disobeying
  • Unauthorized excursions
  • Child spoiling
  • Idling
  • Late home arrivals
  • Bad grades at school
  • Early pregnancy
  • Hard-a-hearing

And many more unpublished diseases.
Spanking ‘created’ the perfect child.

Modern society is moving towards a more passive approach to child corrections. Physically beating a child may result in a legal charge. Many, however, still hold the traditional beliefs that sparing the rod spoils the child.

What are your views? Share below.
Also share some of your experiences with physical corrections.

– Aldeam Facey 2015